(USA TODAY) -- Tim Tebow is tops on the 'Forbes' list. Tim Tebow's influence can't get him an NFL job, but it's enough to put him atop Forbes' rankings of the most influential athletes of 2013.
The unemployed backup quarterback was No. 1 on the magazine's list, finishing ahead of Michael Phelps, Usain Bolt and Derek Jeter. Due to retirement, layoff, injury and, in Tebow's case, Rex Ryan-deemed incompetence, none of the top four athletes has competed in a major event since October.
How did Tebow finish atop the list? We kept looking for the fine print that revealed the survey was conducted among the Bayless family, professional sports bloggers, mega-church booking agents, Florida Gator alumni and founders of abstinence-only education programs, but no, this is the real deal.
Peyton Manning, Drew Brees, Gabby Douglas, Aaron Rodgers, LeBron James and David Beckham rounded out the top 10.
Look, I dislike LeBron as much as the next guy. But come on, the world's greatest basketball player - who won an NBA championship and gold medal in 2012 - is listed behind Drew Brees and Gabby Douglas? Look, I like Gabby as much as the next guy, but her main influence these days is getting people to remember who Gabby Douglas is.