Ryan Lochte of US poses on the podium after winning the men's 4x100m medley relay final during the Short Course Swimming World Championships in Istanbul on December 16, 2012. AFP PHOTO/BULENT KILIC (Photo credit should read BULENT KILIC/AFP/Getty Images)
Olympic swimming star Ryan Lochte will star in a six-episode reality series for E! that will debut in April.
The show will be entitled What Would Ryan Lochte Do?
Well, for starters, he'd probably have spelled it What Wood Ryan Lochte Do and forgot to include the question mark.
In a statement, E! called Lochte "vivescent," which isn't a word and, thus, is a perfect description.
The show will follow Lochte as he looks for one-night stands, trains for the upcoming world championships, hangs out with his family and, presumably, shops for dope, red, double-breasted leather vests.
"How deep is the pool of Ryan Lochte? It turns out, very deep," E! lied in the statement.
The self-answered questions didn't stop there.
"How many people fall in love with the smartest guy in the class?," E! President Suzanne Kolb said to Entertainment Weekly. "They fall for the fastest swimmer."
As a former captain of a high-school swim team, let me assure you this isn't the case.
The statement continued.
"Watching this show, I believe people will fall into three categories: they want to be him, sleep with him or mother him."
Or all three, if that's your kind of thing.
We literally cannot wait for the show to begin in April. Or is it figuratively? Who cares. #jeah
Chris Chase, USA TODAY Sports